hint hint: plastic

Ok sooo am i crazy???
..or could i just be imagining that everyone in my life that holds some type of importance
is leaving me behind...these days i really feel like im drowning
..i am a very good actress....ive learned to hide my feelings, emotions, etc because ive never really felt that anyone cared...

....but for some people hiding their feelings might be a good thing but to constantly hold in emotion is very unhealthy...in result ive said and done things to myself and to others that i never wouldve done if the circumstances were different...like i said before i dont regret anything because everything im not makes me everything i am...

....being an actress isnt easy...you lie to people that you should trust...u never really let anyone in...yes i have bestfriends and some know more about me than others but no one knows everything about me....im trying to change but since my friends are drifting away from me it makes it even harder than usual....

.....with that being said know that im not saying that i lie and hide every little thing, only the things that could let people get uncomfortably close to the real me....i could look perfectly fine on thee outside but on thee inside im usually falling apart (hint hint: plastic)...i just need to find someone who i can trust enough to let in someone who wont turn away fromme, someone that will actually be there for me...im always someones shoulder but who's gonna be mine

....does that make me crazy???