a little sumthin sumthin..

ok sooo i write a little poetry here and there and
i wrote this on the 17 during algebra 2 (hell) but anywhoo..
my friends who read it says its pretty good but a bit scary lol but watever
umm soo let me kno wat u think of it....


As I sit just waiting, thinking
contemplating my inner thoughts
searching for worth, for depth
mind boggling journey, grasping for what
I cant feel, its hiding, running,
my pace is slowing, or is it time
freezing extending every moment
for an hour even longer, darkness
consumes, star gazing no longer an option,
Im here in my solitude
Serenity is unavailable, this task is
becoming harder, so I induldge,
with every sip I become smarter,
my cup no longer runneth over,
so skin rips under the pressure, and
with every drop of blood the pain I smother,
rivers flow from my eyes as I journey through my own mind,
I shy away from humanity,
trying to find my sanity,
until I reach that point
Ill walk this lonely road
thee only soul who can save me is my own

...thee end
= p

life is sooo delicate
at any second everything u
knew can be over

sooo with that being said
make amends with those who u r on bad terms with
let the people that u love know that u love them

live every second as if it were ur last
and live life for no one but urself

...im saying this because its tru
dont let life slip away from u
hold on tight while u can

xoxo

hint hint: plastic

Ok sooo am i crazy???
..or could i just be imagining that everyone in my life that holds some type of importance
is leaving me behind...these days i really feel like im drowning
..i am a very good actress....ive learned to hide my feelings, emotions, etc because ive never really felt that anyone cared...

....but for some people hiding their feelings might be a good thing but to constantly hold in emotion is very unhealthy...in result ive said and done things to myself and to others that i never wouldve done if the circumstances were different...like i said before i dont regret anything because everything im not makes me everything i am...

....being an actress isnt easy...you lie to people that you should trust...u never really let anyone in...yes i have bestfriends and some know more about me than others but no one knows everything about me....im trying to change but since my friends are drifting away from me it makes it even harder than usual....

.....with that being said know that im not saying that i lie and hide every little thing, only the things that could let people get uncomfortably close to the real me....i could look perfectly fine on thee outside but on thee inside im usually falling apart (hint hint: plastic)...i just need to find someone who i can trust enough to let in someone who wont turn away fromme, someone that will actually be there for me...im always someones shoulder but who's gonna be mine

....does that make me crazy???